Advice for those caring for the newly diagnosed
Yesterday afternoon, a dear friend of mine and one of my primary 2006 caretakers told me that her mother received a breast cancer diagnosis that morning.
My first reaction? ‘Oh, no … not another one!’
Why am I always surprised when I hear that someone else has been diagnosed? For God’s sake, the National Cancer Institute estimates 182,460 new cases of invasive breast cancer will be diagnosed in women in the U.S. during 2008. Why the heck am I surprised?
Anyway, I realized as we talked through it that I had a lot of advice for her that I thought I’d share with you all today.
- The person who is just diagnosed with breast cancer may not be able to process everything as quickly as you need her to. Cut her some slack if she seems vague about the details. It’s all too much to take in, honestly. Just listen to what she knows, don’t ask too many questions — give her a few days and then not only ask, but write your questions down and hand them to her so if she doesn’t know the answers she can ask her doctor for them.
- Encourage her to get a second opinion before any treatment actually starts. The testing her doctor recommends can certainly happen but the results of all her diagnostics need to be brought to someone else to review no matter what to either validate the recommended treatment protocol or dispute it — but a second opinion should really be mandatory.
- Make sure she’s got a support system in place immediately. She won’t be thinking straight and she needs to find a way to cope with the pressure and stress and uncertainty straight away. Suggest she walk every day. Suggest she contact the ACS or Y-Me to find a professional or peer volunteer to talk to. Suggest she free herself from any extraneous obligations so she can focus on the big picture: she needs to prepare for battle.
Tonight, my friend’s mother will be in my prayers, as will all of you who are reading The Pink Ribbon Review and learning how to navigate this world of breast cancer that we are living in today.
Tags: breast cancer, breast cancer blog, cancer, health, wellness, womenRelated Stories
POSTED IN: Caregivers, Diagnosis, Statistics, Support
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